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[Video] 7 Tips to Deal with Your Online Haters…

Have you ever let someone else’s comment, judgement or criticism stop YOU from putting your voice out there?

I’ve noticed that a lot of people, when you’re starting or growing your email list, you actually get a little scared of being so visible – so today I want to talk about 7 tips to deal with online criticism – and specifically, what a lot of people call “haters”

Think about it – we all do this. You hyper focus on the ONE hater and forget about all the people you can potentially touch and help! Giving your energy and empowerment away…

You weren’t here to be loved by everyone. The more visible you and your business are online, the more chances you have of encountering a few haters along the way. If you never have any, then you’re not doing something right either!

Let’s face it, you are never going to please everyone and you aren’t here to be liked by everyone.

Here are 3 ways to deal with YOUR haters…

1. Ignore them.

Remove them from your blog or social media. They are not worth your time. Don’t give any energy to the negativity. Think of yourself as having a very light coating of teflon on your skin, or like my mom used to tell me – let it roll right off like water off a duck’s back.

2. Have an “I rock” file.

This is like your mini-cheerleading section in file form. It can either be a file on your computer or a file of things you print out – and it’s full of notes, emails, social media comments from your happy customers, your blog readers, your happy email list subscribers.

3. Give some love to someone else’s online business or someone who is being creative and visible online.

Ok, you got a hater… so now, how about turning that negative energy into something positive for someone else? Maybe it’s someone whose email list you are on – you get email messages from them – or whose blog you read and you’ve never left them a comment letting them know you’re read regularly and appreciate their perspective, or maybe it’s someone you’ve bought a product you loved from. Let them know. Your appreciation to another will go light years in diffusing any negative energy that you may have received from a hater.

Now I want to tackle the other side of this hating coin for the next 3 tips: Have you been a hater? Made a snarky comment to or about someone just to rain on their parade or make yourself feel better?

Or is there something or someone that you’re hating because they are where you’d like to be? I challenge you to be more aware of the energy you’re sending out and consciously become more of a lover and appreciator, and less of a hater. Not in the Don Juan sense, just in appreciating the good in what’s out there. Not moving into envy and jealousy. Hey, we’ve all done this!

Now some tips to help you become a lover and not a hater…

4. Give all people a chance before you judge them.

Give them the benefit of the doubt. You have no idea what’s going on in someone else’s life.

5. Enjoy other people’s success.

There isn’t a finite abundance pie… There’s enough for everyone, if you’re willing to be courageous and make it happen. I like to think of abundance, opportunities, creativity and love as abundant as air… so take a deep breath right now….

That deep breath we just took, mine and yours – didn’t take away from anyone else’s – that’s how I like to think of abundance, opportunities, love and creativity

And the 3rd way to become a lover and not a hater is

6. Open yourself up to your possibilities.

The biggest hater you will ever have is probably sitting right between your ears. Be kind to yourself, be compassionate with yourself. Do not beat yourself up for the failures, they will happen when you are growing in any area. Look for the good and the solutions.

7. Forge Your Own Path.

Please, please, please do not allow them to affect you. When you get scared to be more visible because you might get a hateful comment, you are allowing your path to be created by someone else’s limiting beliefs and negativity.

Did you hear that?

Don’t let someone else choose your path. (Tweet this).

Thank you for watching this video today and I’m so grateful you are part of my email list community because I am clear that

I’m here to help you get self empowered – through the tool of building your email list – so that you have a powerful voice in the world and a thriving business – and this happens through creating your own platform / your own tribe – that you serve.

And really… this whole list building journey is about loving yourself enough to create your platform powerfully – and about loving your tribe enough to share the light you have inside that will make their lives better.

And stay tuned for your invitation to my brand new, hot-off-the-presses webinar – The List Building Workshop – where you’ll learn what’s working now in starting and growing your own email list community.

11 Comments

  1. Susan on March 13, 2015 at 5:54 pm

    Maritza: another fantastic episode, full of great, usable, positive common sense advice.
    I will immediately write on my vision board a reminder to start applying your gem of wisdom:
    Don’t let someone else choose your path.
    I’ll be looking for the good and the solutions. Thank you so much.

    • Maritza Parra on March 13, 2015 at 5:56 pm

      Hey Susan! Awesome! Super excited for you to get your book out in a big way.. 🙂

  2. Ann on March 14, 2015 at 8:58 am

    I love the concept of acting with a ” teflon back AND an open heart. This goes perfectly with something very important I learned from you years ago that has served me well, not being “offendible”, ignore negativity and act out of kindness, positivity and an open heart.

  3. Chuck Wang on March 16, 2015 at 2:04 am

    Maritza, I love the video. You are a super natural in front of the camera. Great presence. Great flow. You are definitely meant to be in front of the camera. So… what are your plans for making that happen in a BIG way? How can I help? Chuckie

    • Maritza Parra on March 16, 2015 at 9:41 am

      Chuck, Can’t wait to see you soon in San Diego! I’m going to repurpose all of the 30 days of LOA content into video format and also a lot more training with video – I do love it and hope it comes through that I’m intending to inspire my viewers! Thank you for your kind words! XOXO (maybe a limited run video podcast, too?)

  4. Joel Boggess on March 16, 2015 at 9:59 am

    Excellent tips and with an easy, fun, and energetic presentation. I totally agree with Chuck, you are a natural.
    I remember getting my first piece of hate mail. I high-fived one of my local mastermind members because it was clear, at least to me, that I was doing something right.
    See you in San Diego Maritza!

    • Maritza Parra on March 17, 2015 at 7:25 am

      Super excited to meet in SD Joel! I absolutely LOVE that you celebrated your first yucky mail!

  5. Nerdy Creator on March 16, 2015 at 10:18 am

    Hey Maritza, great video! I love your tip, especially #3. Turning negative into something positive for someone else. Thank you for always being that positive energy for others and me. The world needs your positive energy. *Double high-five* 🙂

  6. Jodi Flynn on March 16, 2015 at 10:54 am

    Maritza, I love that you put a lot of positive spins on a “negative” experience. I especially loved your tip to give love to others and find ways to support them. It always alleviates my stress to help someone else. Haters are a reality and if I’m putting my work out there I’ll be attracting them. However, I’ll be taking your list with me so that it doesn’t get me down. In fact, I’ll take it as evidence that I’m making a difference. 🙂

  7. EFTdoc on March 16, 2015 at 3:51 pm

    Maritza,
    I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who keeps a file with positive feedback. It really helps. The other tip I really love is to turn the negative energy to give to someone else, so they have a “I rock” file too when something hits them. I know I do better when I’m not hanging out alone and have compassion for myself and others. Thank you for an inspiring message.

  8. Trudy Beerman on March 17, 2015 at 7:08 am

    Celebrating the success of others is a mark of personal confidence. This is a great list Martiza. There WILL always be haters. To listen to the one hater and make it so loud in our head to drown out the cheers of others and the motivating voice in our own heads is such a shame. I know I let it get to me once. It was a close family member whose opinion mattered to me – but then I learned to let them live their own life and I would just go live mine.

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