Heartwork Journaling Certification open for summer 2024 enrollment

The Blog

How Do I Overcome My Paralyzing Fear of Failure? Questions We All Sometimes Ask

Q: I wish to know how to overcome fear of failure because my dreams have been crashed too many times. I can’t trust sincerely and completely in my power, or that the universe will provide me all of my big dreams and needs. What can I do to get over this paralyzing fear?

A: Based on my experience getting over my own fears and working with entrepreneurs who face their fears on a daily basis, you’re stuck identifying yourself with your past failures. When you’re living in the past, you don’t realize exactly the stranglehold it can have on your present and your future.

One of my favorite quotes from Tony Robbins says…

Your past does not equal your future.

First, you are not your past failures.

It may surprise you that I say you are also not your past successes. It doesn’t matter what happened in the past because it is over. Each moment is a new opportunity to create either success or failure. And that will be determined by what you are focusing on. If you are focusing on failure, whether past or perceived… you will create more failure.

Second, please change your language!

Notice the words in the question…

• can’t

• overcome

• failure

• dreams crashed

Language is very important and it’s also a very personal thing. I can’t tell you exactly which words to use, but use language that will make you feel better. I’m betting that those words are not making you feel good. Your words are tools that you using to create your feelings. And your feelings will determine whether or not you feel motivated and inspired to take action to change your present circumstances.

Third, re-frame what you perceive as your past failures.

Look at them with a completely different perspective. Find the lesson. Find the blessing. How did the experience help you grow? What did you learn that’s going to help you turn your dreams into reality? Did the experience help you clarify what you do want to create in your life? Make a list of what you learned from it and how it helped you grow. Look for what you can share with others from those experiences.

Posted in Dreams to Reality, Inspiration

Doodle Your Emotions short preview of the series.

How to Stop Overdrinking Forever -interview with Life Coach Joe Vilardo

Letting go of what others think of you – Heartwork Journaling

You are beautiful! – Heartwork Journaling

What’s Your Arena? – Heartwork Journaling

The Paradox of Change – Heartwork Journaling

3 Comments

Angela on September 14, 2009 at 12:09 pm

Dear Maritza: You always make things so clear for me, as I go daily to your blog, I go away with gems to add to my tool set for success as much in busines as in life. What I needed to hear today is about being stuck in the past, identifying myself with past failures and past behaviours and letting that bringing me to a screatching hault when I’m running full speed ahead for success. I have improved my behaviour in this area but I needed to be reminded that there is no reason to sabotage myself with fears that the past is going to repet itself; you are right. It is certanly a great waste of time, effort and momentum. Today I’ll implement this part of your lesson:
Each moment is a new opportunity to create either success or failure. That thought goes hand in hand with something I have heard you tell your students over and over: a happy, successful life is made of happy, successful moments and we decide to make it so one step at the time. Thank you Maritza. Hugs, Angela

Reply
Omar on September 15, 2009 at 1:23 pm

Mi Maritza,

What you say is so true. It is often said that we are our own worst enemies, and that is especially true when it comes to fear of failure.

We get so bogged down in the “what ifs”, and “I can’t do that” that we never end up doing anything but wonder what it would be like to be successful.

However, just let the past go and focus on what you can start doing today to move forward for the future.

Omar

Reply
Pat & Lorna Shanks on September 15, 2009 at 4:55 pm

Hey Maritza,

Words are very important.

Words activate thoughts. Thoughts activate feelings. Feelings give off an energetic signal. The energetic signal you put out to the world is the same energetic signal you will see and experience in your life.

And you are so right that the inroads in changing your life is to change your language.

A good example was one of your tweets this week about your dog… “Menudo become super-resiliant, brave & happy 3 legged pooch!”

You took what could of been a negative and turned into a very positive outlook.

So every moment is a new opportunity to create what ever we want to create. So make it positive and make it work for you.

Thanks for being you.
Love & Hugs
–Pat & Lorna
http://TheCoolestCouple.com

Reply